How to support a friend struggling with fertility issues. By @filipajackson
I got a lot of DMs about this topic, and to be honest it’s not really one that I have ever thought about. I was so wrapped up in the fertility side of things, and providing knowledge and support to those struggling that I never thought about the support system. So what do you say? How do you act? When your friend or loved one is going through fertility issues. Well I wrote an in-depth blog post about this which is already live, but I thought I would break some tips down here too, as it’s obviously something a lot of you are struggling with. And although I can’t talk on behalf of everyone dealing with fertility, these are just my opinions…
1. Let’s talk about you! I never told my friends that I was struggling, and I never told them for a reason. Our fertility issues would play on my brain 24/7 so when I hung out with my friends it was a welcome escape to talk about anything but. Hearing their issues gave me comfort and brought me back to reality. For that tea date (or whatever), I was me again.
2. Forget the advice because you truly don’t know what someone is going through. Heck I don’t even truly understand the feelings of someone else going through fertility issues. It’s a very personal journey and everyone deals with it in their own way. So unless you’re asked for advice just don’t give it. There is nothing worse than being told to ‘just relax and it will happen’, or that your friend did this and it was successful. If your friend is willing to speak to you, then listen.
3. Be that shoulder, allow it to be cried on. Bring comfort to the situation. Allow them to rant, to cry, to laugh. Listen and hold their hand.
4. Distractions are key! Like I had previously said getting away from my thoughts was super important. If you can, organize something. Take all the worries of planning away from them and treat them. Whether it’s for a tea date, picnic, shopping trip or full on vacay! Distractions are welcomed.