“On Friday, my husband and I met with a new reproductive endocrinologist to talk about our options for future fertility treatments. It was exciting to dream again and to plan our next steps for growing our family. ⠀
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We didn’t know what to expect during this appointment, or how we’d feel about this new clinic and doctor, but we walked away feeling enthusiastic and hopeful. Our treatment options include either one more medicated IUI cycle (with a new protocol) or IVF. ⠀
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The thought of starting treatments again excites me beyond words, but I’m nervous and anxious, too. We know IVF will give us our best chance at pregnancy, and most of the time, this is where my heart guides me. But this process isn’t easy, and I find myself going back and forth second-guessing our treatment plans all the time. I have moments where the thought of moving forward with IVF brings me my highest hopes, and yet in that same breath, it can also bring forth some of my deepest fears. ⠀
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I am hopeful treatment will bring us our sweet babies. So, why is this decision so hard to make? Is it the needles, hormones, the financial pressures, the unknown, the “what if’s,” the past traumas, or the emotional and physical exhaustion that comes along with it? ⠀
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Whatever it might be, I am still standing at the IVF/IUI crossroads, and that’s ok. We are taking the next couple of weeks to sit with our thoughts, meditate, and take in all the information we can before we move forward with treatment. We’re feeling good, and we’re hopeful, and I’m confident that whichever route we choose will be the right one for us.⠀
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How did you decide when it was time to move on to IVF? What helped you overcome some of your fears about the process/treatment? How did you come to your decision?”
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I have found this so comforting to know that so many women like myself are not alone.
My husband and I have been TTC for 3 years. When we met with our fertility specialist it was all laid out and presented and I like you was faced with the decision.
We have been given “unexplained infertility” this is maddening… nothing is wrong with me, nothing wrong with him… me at 36 at the time I wanted to try the least invasive way possible, and of course the cost of IUI/IVF weighed heavily. We chose to start with iui, after 4 rounds 2 with oral meds and 2 with injections…. we decided to go onto IVF. We did not know if it was a timing concern, or an actual fertilization concern.
This January I prepped for our first round of IVF, out of the 11 follicles collected we had 2 embryos who made it to the frozen 5 days stage!!! We transferred one at a time, February was the first transfer and unfortunately our BETA was negative… I guess I was naive to think that IVF wouldn’t work… being my first time and I haven’t really blogged, posted on social media, just spoke with some people who have had success, it really never crossed my mind that I would not have success.. my lining is beautiful and the grade is the embryo is perfect I would hear… but the negative result hit me hard…
I knew we had another try! I thought positive, we have one more shot! We spoke with the doctor as to why it failed and they recommended increased medication, steroids, intralipid infusions to see if the second round would be more successful.
After waiting out COVID we transferred our embryo the end of July… again we had a negative BETA. We have another follow up on Monday to discuss why…. we are waiting for my cycle to begin to start for our 2nd round of IVF! I can’t just do one!!! I am not giving up hope that I am meant to be a mother. I am determined to have my own baby.. it is a mental, physical, emotional, and financial strain but the outcome is going to be just amazing!!! It is hard to read/hear everyone’s journey of both success and and not being successful. I have tried to stop using failure… Failure is not an option!!! We will be mothers someday!
I would try to do a few IUI’s if they recommend and see what happens… IVF has a higher percentage but again there is no guarantee. We are warriors going through this process that we are learning as we go.. this is not taught by our parents are in school, we rely on each other and the fertility experts to guide us on the path of the unknown. I hope this was helpful, my story is going to be different from yours, and others.
Find things to help make you happy and distract you during that TTW, puzzles a craft, good book, favorite movies… it is daunting for your first time, but try your best to stay off Google… your journey is unique to you and it will get inside your head reading about others… (trust me, I was on.. why am I not feeling this.. why am I not feeling that) I try to stay off as much as possible now!
I hope I was able to help guide your answer but my ultimate advice is to listen to your heart, and you and your husband will make the best decision for you and your growing family. People around you who love you will share with you their thoughts and opinions, and while we will listen to them with love and compassion we don’t have to do what they say… I have learned that people have good intentions but say the “just”… statements… “relax” “wait for your time will come” “stop thinking about it”… don’t ya think we have done all that!!
Keep faith, and one thing no one can take a way from us is Hope and Love… 💕
All the best and I wish you so much success and sticky dust coming your way
💜Shanna