“It’s been a draining week.
A flood of emotion around gratitude and worry.
I was super hesitant to post this.
Because I would never want it to look like I’m being dramatic or looking for sympathy or attention.
But really, I am posting this because I would love to see a post like this on my feed right now.
I want to feel not so alone.
I want others to know that they aren’t the only ones feeling scared, overwhelmed, anxious and sad.
I am posting this for the others like me.
Crew has showed signs of some developmental delays. I don’t want to put a title on it, because we still don’t know what the future holds — maybe these characteristics are just a stage, maybe he will grow out of them, or maybe they are something that will be with him for the rest of his life.
We just don’t know.
And that’s what makes it even more scary.
Another reason I decided to post this is because I would never want Crew to think that I want to hide his differences from the world. I am not embarrassed or ashamed of him. I am so proud of who he is entirely. Any diagnosis or label could never change the way I love and think of him. He’s still my perfect little dude. He’s still the boy I fell in love with when I held him in my arms for the first time.
Dean and I are extremely emotionally drained.
We are overwhelmed by all the information. And also thankful for it.
I am crying as much as I did right after having Crew (…that’s a lot, by the way).
As we figure out what next steps to take, I am reminded to remain thankful.
Thankful for Crew and his life.
Thankful for the best husband on earth.
Thankful for an amazing, supportive community.
Thankful for resources and information.
Thankful for strangers who have already reached out to me, sharing their experiences.
The list goes on…
Yes, right now it seems daunting, but I know that it will get easier with time, and we will discover our new, beautiful normal.”