Fast forward to coming up on one year into marriage and a trip to Italy where I thought (very naively) I would simply go off birth control, conceive on our amazing anniversary trip and become a mom soon after, right? So.very. wrong. Right before our trip I was told by my OBGYN that there was literally no chance I could get pregnant on my own and would have to consult with a fertility specialist (after going the clomid route unsuccessfully) because my PCOS did not resolve and was still very much an issue.
This was a tough pill to swallow for both me and my husband. I’m the oldest of 4 and from as far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a mom. Friends got pregnant and although I was genuinely so happy for them, my heart broke each time wondering if that would ever happen for me.
We started fertility treatments in November of 2017. The blur of injections, raging hormones, blood work, sonograms and doctors appointments is a distant memory, but still one that exhausts and stings me a little thinking about it now. I had to be so closely monitored with medications that were so carefully tweaked as with PCOS you have many follicles that you do not ovulate and the IUI process does not give you the best control over how many mature to be fertilized.
Our first IUI was a fail and that really hurt. It felt like those months of injections and track marks on my arms from so much bloodwork, aside from the mental and physical exhaustion both me and my husband were feeling was for nothing. But, we moved along full steam ahead as soon as I was cleared for the next round. We had an upcoming trip for my 30th and it was getting down to the wire. We were able to get our second IUI done in time before leaving and I tried to be cautiously optimistic but guarded this time.
Fast forward to the longest 2 weeks later, I get the call that I was pregnant!! But the biggest shock of all was, it was TWINS! A whole new bomb was dropped on us but in the best way possible. Today, I am the mom of 18 month old wild, funny, amazing little loves of you life.
I hope if nothing else, this gives anyone feeling lost in their PCOS or other fertility struggles some hope (x2). It’s a long and grueling road with so many ups and downs. Sending all my love to those who know this struggle all to well. It’s time to get rid of the stigma surrounding infertility and lift each other up though one of the darkest times a woman can face. You are not alone ”