Birth Motherhood Pregnancy

Why It’s Important To Be Your Own Advocate During Birth


My birth story was far from what we dream or imagine it to be. It was traumatic. I was treated less than acceptable. But that’s not the worst part. What’s worse is my OB (at the time) did not listen to me. She dismissed what I was voicing, which ultimately put me and my unborn child’s lives at risk.

During labor we as women are at our most vulnerable. We are relying on those around us, those who we have entrusted with a moment so precious, to be looking out for our best interests. I could not believe the mistreatment I was receiving by someone who at all of my prenatal appointments had seemed so wonderful.

My OB was in a rush and grew impatient because my unmedicated birth was not fitting into the time frame of her busy schedule. My baby suffered at the hands of an OBs impatience and neglect. He was diagnosed with shoulder dystocia, which could have been prevented if she had been more attentive and listened to me, her patient. I’m thankful that was the worst physical suffering that my baby had. But my mental and emotional pain still creeps in.

Be an advocate for yourself and the women in your life. @stylefitfatty said it so well, “If you don’t feel safe, comfortable, or heard by your provider LEAVE AND GET A NEW ONE. Statistics has shown that black women are 3x more likely to die from pregnancy/childbirth related causes because of neglect and rooted racist beliefs.”

I wish I had felt the ability to speak up more for myself during labor and delivery. The thought that the outcome could look a whole lot different is real.

These photos are more than just a mom holding her newborn baby. This is me and my baby surviving, overcoming and beating the odds.”

Instagram: @kitandme

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