Second Child

One of the most frequentIy asked questions I get is ‘I’m scared. How could I possibly love another child as  much as my first born?’ Let me tell you… I was too. 🙋🏼‍♀️I remember the nights I’d choose stressing over bringing another baby into this world over sleep.. (that and pregnancy insomnia 😂) The days leading up to giving birth I would sit in Zyla’s room watching her sleep and just cry… mourning these last moments of just the two of us.. (I pretty much continued to cry until the moment I gave birth 😅) I remember feeling ashamed & embarrassed that I couldn’t yet comprehend my ability to simultaneously love both children…..❤️Then it happened.. That moment. The moment  you hear that little cry for the first time, touch those little hands & feel then laying on your chest, and it all made sense. I understood that your heart does not remain the same! It doubles. It’s not about loving them ‘equally’ but loving them both wholeheartedly. I understood that this was exactly how it was meant to be. Zyla walked in the room and met her brother for the first time (cue crying 😭😭😭) & every doubt, every negative thought I had while pregnant was what didn’t make sense anymore . It is sometimes  hard to find the right words to explain such an overwhelming feeling and experience & I can assure you that you will still have these small doubts regardless of what anyone says… But I promise that moment will come & all of a sudden it will all make sense ✨…. (Then instead you’ll be asking if you’re a horrible mum because you love  whichever one is sleeping better at the moment 😉 ) 

Instagram : @stephluck

Cancer & Surrogacy: Lottery Baby

“At the age of nine, I lost all chances of carrying a pregnancy due to ovarian cancer. I was told that I’d win the lottery twice before ever having a biological child. Sixteen years post hysterectomy, our fertility specialist harvested 33 eggs from my single ovary and one of my childhood best friends offered to carry for us. Within two weeks of learning we were expecting twins, we lost our Baby B. My world stopped. I was never able to have children, then I had two, and quickly had to give one of them back. My heart was shattered. How do you balance the love for one twin while your heart aches for the other? In February 2019, our surrogate delivered the most beautiful baby boy. As soon as I laid eyes on him, I knew he was mine and somehow he always knew me. I won the lottery. “ 📸

Photograph by @stephanie.n.baker

Brain Cancer Can’t Stop Babies

“Several months ago we found out my husbands brain tumor had grown back.. a fear we’ve been living with for the past 5 years since he was diagnosed with a grade 2 astrocytoma. Doctors then proceeded to tell us that treatment would include another surgery followed by chemo and radiation – nearly diminishing our chances of ever having another baby naturally. It was then we decided that cancer wouldn’t control us and began trying, hoping that with a little bit of time we could potentially fall pregnant. When it didn’t happen the first month, I felt down. When it didn’t happen the second month my spirits became a bit broken – I started to realize that our dream of having two kids may not play out exactly how we wanted. Soon enough Christmas passed and I began feeling tired. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t break it. Then came my favorite, vomiting all day. Sure enough I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. When I told Jacob tears rolled down his face. Despite all the bad news we’d received we knew that bringing a new life into this world was the greatest gift. As I write this we prepare for another brain surgery in 2 weeks. I’m scared for what’s to come but we’ll never let this cancer control our lives. I love my husband more than words, more than life. This little rainbow girl gives us such hope 🌈🎀”

Instagram: @life.beside.hudson

Love At First Sight

“My entire pregnancy I would find myself having break downs over not being ready for the impending baby and the closer and closer I got to having Edwin, the more scared I became. I never found myself overjoyed or excited like I felt I was “supposed to” and even when I felt the baby kick, I thought it was cool, but I still never felt a connection to my pregnancy that I thought I was meant to. Everyone in my life assured me that as soon as I held my baby in my arms everything would change, but I was in such a dark place I couldn’t see how that was even remotely possible. Thankfully, no matter how many times I shared my fears and broke down in front of my husband, he supported me. Luckily, in my case, everyone who told me my feelings would change as soon as I saw my baby were completely, 100% right, and pregnancy ended up being the hardest part of my motherhood journey thus far. As soon as I laid eyes on my sweet little Edwin, I felt the overwhelming weight I carried for so long lifted off my shoulders and nothing but love was left in my heart.”

Instagram: @theblondielocks

Photo by: @candaceberryphotography

Rainbow 🌈 Babies

“My rainbow babies, Evelyn and James! I had a miscarriage last January after trying to get pregnant for over a year and after surgery for endometriosis. I knew even before I got pregnant with the twins that I wanted to do a shot like this when/if I got pregnant again to honor that first baby. I never would’ve dreamed this picture would be taken with twins, and I couldn’t be happier with how it turned out. 

Post by: @c.squared2018

Photo by: @ellabellaphotography

Sacrifice & Pain

“My husband snap this pic on his way out this morning and it couldn’t be more me right now 🤰🏻Like I’ve said before, there are so many sides to pregnancy. It’s amazing, it’s beautiful, there’s such a connection and bonding throughout pregnancy that you can’t describe to others. BUT there is also sacrifice and pain. And the reality is, some days I’d love to get outta bed and get that ‘cute bump update’ but that’s not always the reality. Not at all, and I know for some of you pregnancy is really really hard. YOU GUY ARE THE CHAMPS! This has been my last 6 weeks . This is my view, literally. I’m not complaining AT ALL in the sense that I am EXTREMELY grateful to carry life! Truly I am. I just thought I’d give you another shot of my view and life too. The one that requires what’s keeping me going:
-Heating pads are my life 🙌🏻
-pressure point balls are everything
– my vitamins and iron and stool softer( tmi) 😘
-lotions of all sorts
-my beautiful night gowns I wear daily (Walmart is proud)
-waist bands to help lift or put pressure on my ribs
– cold water by my bed at all times & hundreds of pillows .always
Happy 36 weeks! Remembering the good and the hard because it’s all moments to get my girl here!”

Three Blessings

“Do everything with so much love in your heart that you would never want to do it any other way.”
When the doctor told me I was pregnant with triplets they asked me if I wanted to terminate one of my twins so the other one would have a better chance of survival during the pregnancy. This was because they shared a placenta and there’s a risk of TTTS (twin twin transfusion syndrome). This is basically where one twin can grow and the other not so well. And also because of the risk factors to me carrying three babies. I couldn’t believe they would ask me that right after they told me I had three babies inside me. But I know it’s just something they have to do. I looked at my husband in complete shock and he said “no”. And I looked at the Doc and I said not a chance. I worked for two years to get pregnant and you ask me that? Hell no…whatever is in the cards is what will be, and I’m a risk taker. I couldn’t imagine life now without all of my sweet little angels. I wanted them ALL so badly and made them with so much love. I am so glad I took a chance and made that difficult decision. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Straight Outta The Lab

“Are they natural?” is a question I have been asked more times than you would think over the past two years. Most times I’m not quite sure how to answer that. Part of me wants to throw out a sarcastic, “nope they are robots who look really human like,” sort of a response but most of the time I know why I’m getting asked that. It’s the apparent subtle (not really) way of asking if we conceived twins naturally. Here’s my two cents.
My babes are as natural as they come. As natural as.they.come. The road to parenthood is fragile. Many of us have faced unfathomable heartache and been thru war to have our children. Our journey is filled with repeated failed attempts, feelings of hopelessness, fights with insurance companies, years of waiting and unthinkable debt to make our dream come true. While devastating to hear that I had almost a 0% chance of ever conceiving a child, let alone two at once, I am immensely grateful for the genius minds and incredible science behind fertility methods that create miracles for people each and every day. Think about what it took to discover, test, and approve all of the amazing options we have out there today to have a child! Pretty remarkable right!? And let’s talk for a moment about all of the selfless warriors working tirelessly to match a child to their forever home! I carry zero negativity in my heart and truly do not fault anyone for what they don’t know and appreciate them wanting to start a conversation about my babes! I love talking about them! I just want to bring an awareness to our journey and be a voice for our tribe. I think the next time someone asks me if they are natural I will tell them “as natural as my beating heart.”

“Don’t have kids they will ruin your life!”

“There was a time when i was young that I actually thought if you have a child your life would be over, i had grown up hearing ” don’t have kids they will ruin your life”!. But why?!? I didn’t understand why some people would say such a thing and Iwas a kid! That made me feel like there was something wrong with me that my parents ruined their lives because of me and my siblings.
It showed me not to have kids it deterred me away from even caring about kids and sometimes even myself, i started to feel lost in a world of hate, hurt and loneliness. I felt that i was a burden on everyone around me i didn’t fit in as well at primary school, it was hard to understand the other kids because i didn’t really understand myself  i felt trapped in my own mind my own skin my temple and could not break free from the thoughts that kept coming. Feeling like a failure at everything never having enough confidence to express my true self, not wanting to connect with others being disconnected from my own family growing up with violence day to day as if it was normal, even being told by other kids i was the accident in the family, it was a cruel world that I didn’t even know or understand yet.
Then one day I just woke up, I woke up to the lies that people spread to have control over your life! I felt that people just felt that had the right to say things like ” you’re making a big mistake or that’s it your life is ruined or you need or have to travel the world before you have kids or don’t have kids their rotten little creatures (horrified that people say these things even parents!). All this evil and hate upon children and even from people that have never had a child do they even realize they were once children? That our children are our future?!? I wish I woke up sooner in life to all the wrongs and right, I wish I had people around me telling me how wonderful children actually are that they are what makes us stronger our hearts fuller, kids are our future. It took me to have my first child to fall back in love with my life my body and children, I felt alive I felt reborn into a world that i needed to help other mothers to see mums to be to see that life is creation life is family life is love my 3 babes are the best things that have ever happened to me but apparently thats ruining my life… I say no, I say the ones saying these horrible words are the very people who are lonely who are sad who don’t understand love and are way too selfish. They have been brought up to think it’s wrong to have children… really? Is this really how we live, is this really how we should be teaching our children? One thing for sure is that i will never ever let my children feel the way I did growing up I will give them all the love our world has to offer. I will teach my children that they are god with in themselves they are the future they are bloody god dam special and they deserve the world and i wont stop there, ill share my love to all children i want them all to know they are special and they deserve so much 💓.
The world is theirs and we must protect them from the dangers around them.
I know that my children aren’t a mistake they are a gift of life that we should think ourselves lucky we even get and to keep our race surviving, they are the future.

Instagram: @sherieheather

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